A “Mastermind” Meeting….maybe you’ve heard of them, maybe not. They are known as gatherings of the top internet marketers in the world, where they discuss their futures, possible joint ventures, how to bilk every last cent out of their email lists, and basic global domination. Only a select few are invited….the elite, the creme de la creme. And sometimes…just sometimes….someone weasels their way into one of these meetings….under false pretenses.

Think about it, what if someone were to con an invitation to one of these meetings, appearing to be a highly recommended newcomer, only to truly be infiltrating the secret sessions with an intention of exploiting these “gurus” for what they really are?

Enter the Rich Jerk and his highly recommended accomplice.

Near the end of July, just such a meeting happened in Las Vegas. I won’t go into too much detail about it….just yet. But let’s just say that some BIG “gurus” were there.

Stay tuned……

So much happening here. But as some of my ladies from Compton & Long Beach say, “It’s all good”. You see, I don’t discriminate. Sometimes I do go black, and then I come back. (Next time I’ll discuss the Asian persuasion.)

A personal note to female readers: Go ahead and continue sending me your pics and marriage proposals. I’ve been getting so many over the past 6 months that I’m going to put up a photo gallery soon for all to see. The hotter pics will obviously be displayed first, so make sure yours are good. If you are FUGLY, don’t waste my time. When you send a pic, make sure you hold some sort of sign in the pic that has a message for me. That way I know it’s legit.

Speaking of ladies, you can check out my new MySpace page at www.myspace.com/richjerkspace – You’ll notice I have a nice assortment of “friends”.

Some of these friends will be coming to the MTV Movie Awards pre-party I’m sponsoring in the Hollywood Hills.

$15 Million Dollar Mansion + Celebs + Hot Chicks + WSO Poker Tournament + Open Bar = Kick ass party, Rich Jerk style.

Below is a pic of the Rich Jerk party house – a mere 10,000 sq. ft. overlooking all of Los Angeles.

Enlarge image

One last thing before I go….if you are one of those people who still isn’t making a f*cking dime on the internet and needs one-on-one help from a Rich Jerk guru, check out this page – www.therichjerk.com/site/privatecoaching

Or you can continue trying to live vicariously through me. Sh*t I would envy me too if I was you.

RJ

The Rich Jerk has become a phenomenon. I’ve already received over 50,000 emails, and my site is the 3,000th most popular site on the internet….out of millions of sites, receiving over 2 million unique visitors in the last 5 months. I’ve clearly struck a chord. Whether you love it or hate it, I’m still better than you……and you know it.

Over the past 5 months I’ve also taken a lot of heat from lazy, idiot critics, who have no idea about my program, or who bought it and never used it because they are too fu*king pathetic. And you know what? I like it. Keep it coming. When I get 10 emails from people who want me to go to Hell, and then 1 from someone who just quit there mind-numbing job and is now making $10k/month, telling their boss to shove it up their ass, it’s somewhat satisfying. I enjoy having added more Rich Jerks to this world, because I know these new Rich Jerks are making even more people jealous, and getting under their skin. And when jealous fu*king wastes of life show their true colors, I know I’ve done my job. It’s my personal goal to dig into the guts of these losers, either directly or indirectly. And I know I’ve done that.

I’m most definitely a jerk, obnoxious, condescending, annoying, foul-mouthed and disgustingly good-looking…..but one thing I’ll never be is jealous…of anyone. I think jealousy is the most fu*ked up characteristic anyone can have. I love to see people making it big. Bill Gates, that million dollar homepage kid, the guy who invented the pet rock, whoever. It doesn’t matter. These people did their thing, and that kicks ass.

Are you ever gonna do your thing? Probably not. So send me your lame-ass email instead, and call it a day.

Next up, I’m gonna show some pics of my commercial, hanging out at the mansion with Maxim girls. It’s a rough life. And I may actually start giving away some money making tips for free on this blog, if I’m in a good mood. You should be so lucky.

RJ

For 2006 I resolve to keep taking your money and spending it on things I don’t need.

Now that I got that out of the way, I’d like to address those people who are positive that my website is a scam. You know what the great thing is about a website like mine? The X button in the top right hand corner of the page. That button is VERY useful for people who KNOW I’m a scam because they have……proof…er wait no they don’t….they have a friend who said…um wait no….they have a “feeling”…yeah that’s it…..a FEELING that I’m a scam….yeah that’s right. They have a FEELING that the Rich Jerk is a fu**ing scammer bastard…yes that’s it….and they are ALWAYS right about this sort of thing. There is NO POSSIBLE WAY the Rich Jerk’s program could be legit. I mean look at this guy. He talks down to people. He’s obnoxious. He’s selling a “get rich quick” program and EVERYBODY knows that “get rich quick” programs are fake. He’s obviously a scam.

Or wait…could it be that….no nevermind……it couldn’t….or….hold on….could it?…Could it possibly be that calling the Rich Jerk a scam is just a cover up excuse? A cover up excuse for cry-babies who are too scared and lazy to try something with a 100% money back guarantee and thousands of positive reviews all over the Internet? Something that could possibly change their lives? Hmmm….I may be onto something here. And if so, that would mean that some people are lying to themselves. In that case, YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE. And right now you’re trying to justify that. And guess what? YOU are the one doing the SCAMMING. You’re SCAMMING yourself. You don’t REALLY want to change your life. You’d rather make excuses. And I DON’T HAVE TIME FOR YOUR LAME-ASS EXCUSES. So remember that X button we talked about before? Go ahead and click it now and PRESTO!! No more scam! How about that? Now run along and go cry to mommy.

On another note, I’d also like to point out that all of the “comments” written in response to my blog entries are fake. Apparently my staff creates these responses to make people think my product is better. Those sneaky devils. But they must not be doing a very good job at it because so many of you brainiacs have caught on! And I was obviously in on it. I’m really embarrassed. I’ve been outwitted by all of you savvy net detectives who have caught me in this intricate plot to fool everyone who reads my blog. But wait a second…..all of those comments have….names….emails…..websites…. all attached to their profiles. That would mean that my staff must have spent many hours creating hundreds of fake names, email addresses and websites just for the sake of posting fake blog comments. Wow, that’s a lot of work. That doesn’t make much sense does it? Exactly.

You know what else? I typed “rich jerk” in Google the other day and literally thousands of articles and reviews came up. It was tough to find any that had bad things to say about my program. Conspiracy theorists unite!! The Rich Jerk has obviously paid off thousands of people to write good reviews about his program! NONE of them are real……are they? Nahhh. And those testimonials on my website, those are obviously soooooooo fake. That thing I wrote on the testimonials page about swearing they are all real, under penalty of perjury…..I guess I could be looking at jail time! Oh well. I’ll go ahead and leave it up there anyway.

It all just goes to show I’ve been exposed in my heinous plot at world domination…..scamming people 49 bucks at a time.

RJ

Hello losers. I just got back from shooting some scenes for my upcoming commercial. Yes, I’m doing a f**king commercial. It will air nationwide (USA) in February. And I’m still cracking up. It’s destined to be a classic. No stupid infomercial. No BS. It’s the ultimate Biz-Opp commercial, like no one has ever seen before….Rich Jerk Style.

So, more millions on the way. Ahh, life is really rough in my world. Waking up and knowing that I have more money than I’ll ever spend, and more on the way. Meanwhile, I have people working for me every day, pumping out new websites for me, using my strategies as a platform in hundreds of niches. It’s like a well-oiled machine. And the rich get richer. Maybe one day you’ll understand. But I doubt it. You probably haven’t even read my book and used my strategies have you? I bet my ebook is printed out and sitting in thousands of peoples’ desks right now, collecting dust. But that’s okay with me….I already got paid for them.

By the way, my staff is getting a lot of idiot-mail lately from people who claim they have more money than me, that I’m not rich, etc. Guess what? I DON’T CARE. I barely value my customers (because I know 99.9% won’t do what I tell them), so why the hell would I value a non-customer? Get a f**kin life. We all know you don’t have sh** and you’re jealous. In the time it takes you to write me, you could have gotten into your 79′ Celica and been on the the way to the unemployment office, where a nice minimum wage job awaits. Try to manage your time better. Don’t let me be responsible for you missing out on a job cleaning toilets.

And now it’s time for Christmas. Great, just what I need, extended family members who I never talk to suddenly inviting me to gatherings, hoping I’ll share my wealth in the form of expensive presents. Don’t these people know by now, IT AIN’T GONNA HAPPEN. I can barely stand the immediate family that I do see every now and then, let alone extended family. It’s to the point where I despise holidays. So let this be a lesson to ya, when you make money people will come out of the woodwork looking for a handout, INCLUDING FAMILY.

That’s enough ranting for now. There are so many things that annoy me. I’m frequently asked if there is anything I DO like. Well here they are:

Exquisite Toys and Exquisite Women.

RJ

I’m back from another long vacation. Don’t worry about where I went. It’s not important, because you’ll never get to go there.

I went to my office today to fire a few people, and after that we read some of my hate mail. We all had a good laugh, then crumpled them up into a large ball, put a few rubber bands around them and played a game of office baseball. So keep the hate mail coming. I especially get a kick out of the ones from people saying that it’s people like me who put the world in the situation it’s in, etc. Apparently by kicking people in the ass and telling them they’re worthless if they don’t actually DO something with their lives, I’m a detriment to society. Sounds to me more like I struck a nerve with some people who aren’t satisfied with their pathetic lives, and they need an excuse for not doing sh**, so they write long winded stories to me about how they are happy being poor, because at least they have “principles”.

Wait a second. They might actually be right. I think somewhere along the way I may have lost my principles. Could it be? I suddenly feel the urge to be a do-gooder. Oh man, this is serious. What’s happening? Now I think I see the error of my ways. I don’t have the “principles” that people want me to have. What was I thinking? Of course, that’s it….being poor, but having “principles” IS the only way to go…..At least then I could feel good about myself….I really do need to change…..this isn’t working……I have a large bank account but again, where are my principles?….I feel so horrible about how I’ve acted. I need to change my ways….I’m a disgusting, horrible, horrible person. This is it……I’m having an epiphany. I’m going to be better. I have to be better. I’m going to give all of my money to charity……I’m going to join the Peace Corps. I’m going to make a difference. Then people will respect me. And that’s what I really should be living for. I should strive to make everyone like me. That’s what it’s all about. I should abide by everyone else’s rules of right and wrong. I’m going to do it! I’m going to change!…I’m….I’m…oh wait….I forgot….

I DON’T GIVE A SH** ABOUT WHAT PEOPLE THINK OF ME.

Phew….that was close. I almost became like everybody else. My alter ego, the good guy, almost came through. Luckily I squashed him down before I fell into the trap of being a mediocre, low to middle class clone that falls into line, goes to his 9 to 5, makes just enough to pay the bills, but somehow finds the time to complain about his life….DAILY. I almost got to be a hypocrite too, like the losers who write to me. You know, the people who JUDGE me, and tell me I’m going to Hell. Those who are more “righteous” than I am. The ones who are good people when it’s convenient for them. Funny thing is, someone very important once said “Judge Not, Lest Ye Be Judged”. I guess that only applies to me.

Wow, I really got off on a tangent there. I can hear the keyboards being pounded now as more hate mail comes my way. That’s okay, perhaps when you are done judging me, you will actually read my book, put the strategies to use, and make a lot of money. Then you can give it to charity or do whatever you want with it. Of course I’ll continue judging people myself, because I don’t claim to be righteous person.

In the meantime, I’ll be relaxing somewhere, where my biggest decision will be whether I want Shiatsu or Swedish.

See ya,

RJ